


Break the Silence

by oppressa



Series: Kurt and Raven, Raven and Kurt (After Berlin) [4]
Category: X-Men (Movieverse), X-Men: Apocalypse (2016) - Fandom
Genre: Aftermath, Backstory, Campfires, Dark Past, Family Issues, Gen, Sequel, allusions to medical experimentation on mutants
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-07
Updated: 2016-06-08
Packaged: 2018-07-12 12:24:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,330
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7103272
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/oppressa/pseuds/oppressa
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Raven's decided to tell Kurt something about where he comes from.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is a follow-on to a previous fic about Kurt finding out Raven is his mother, but you don't really need to read that -- the set up is just that she saved him again, from Stryker, and feels that she owes him an explanation this time.
> 
> I pieced together what Raven says from very loose knowledge of the comics and not-too good remembrances of the Future Past movie, it's not meant to be a definitive take or anything. Also my posting is a bit rushed, there was meant to be more to it and there may well be mistakes -- I might have to revise it sometime. Anyway, I hope it's semi-okay for now!

Kurt is remarkably chipper now given how she found him, strapped to an examination bench next to a tray of metal instruments stinking of old blood, his eyes shut tight, face stained with tear tracks. The only consolation is she guesses that he must have been put under for most of it. But Stryker told him why he'd been brought there, obviously. She didn't want him to find out like that. She didn't want him to find out at all. Although in some ways it's a relief, that she can't really go on pretending she just has a soft spot for him any more.

She dreads to think what would have been done to him because of her, if she hadn't managed to tear her way through the new base in time. It's only now she's regretting that she didn't get her hands on Stryker himself. Still, perhaps it would have been nothing to what Azazel would have done to his own offspring if he'd found out he survived. Raven's feigned disinterest in how he did so far, but it's possible she'll learn the truth soon enough, Kurt's the type to volunteer information without being asked; he's so glad to be out of there, so grateful, again. If she'd known he'd be this easy to love, maybe she would have done things differently, in the past. Maybe. Who can tell, with all the things she's done.

She watches him, sitting on the other side of the fire, the end of his tail twitching above his head. The light the flames cast on his face in the shadows of the forest make it look more demonic, unlike that goofy photograph of him that makes her smile whenever she looks at it, and to a greater degree like Azazel's, to her.

Surprisingly, his first question is about Stryker.

“The man who took me.” He shudders. “What does he have against you?”

“He had a program running in the 70's. Butchering mutants from an army camp. I managed to save some of them. There's other reasons too, some he's made up in his mind. But really he doesn't need one. He just hates our entire kind. Those like us more than most.”

“Did you save a lot of people?”

“Not enough. You were the first in a long time.”

He smiles tentatively. She smiles back.

“How did you know where to look for me?”

“I learned about the cage matches in Berlin first. There was information they had acquired a new amusement for the crowd, that it was just a kid. A teleporting mutant, with a tail. And it sounded...it sounded a lot like someone I used to know. He wasn't blue, like you are. And he wouldn't have to be forced into fighting. But I had to go and see. And there you were. I'm so sorry, Kurt.”

“That someone you knew, you're talking about my father?”

“His name was Azazel. He was from the Soviet Union. He was very powerful, and strong, older than I was. I hadn't known anyone like him before, or since.”

“What happened to him?”

She swallows. “An anti-mutant society killed him, not long after you were born. I don't want you to feel bad about that. He wasn't really a good person. You didn't get that from him. Not from me, either, really.”

“But did you love him?”

He wants to know why he was abandoned. He just doesn't want to ask her upfront, though he has every right to. Now she has to make up her mind whether to lie, or to get it off her conscience for good.

“Yeah, I loved him, Kurt, but we couldn't stay together. And I couldn't look after you on my own, not then. It was for the best, I thought, that you didn't know...” _That you didn't live. I wanted to get through to him. I wanted to punish him by leaving his son for dead. But he didn't care anyway, and I was the one who suffered._ “You were only a baby, then.” She says.

“Okay.”

“Okay?” She raises her eyebrows. “That's it?”

“Ja, das ist es. You came back for me. You saved my life.”

She hadn't really thought about it that way, that saving his life – twice now probably – might just make up for trying to bury his memory when he wasn't even a year old. Even if she can't forgive herself, Kurt forgives her. There appears to be such a capacity in him for that.

“Kommen sie hier.”

He crosses around the fire to her side. She puts her arm over his narrow shoulders, pushes his face to look at it, to feel its warmth, while she kisses his cheek.

“Mama.” He whispers, like he's trying out the word. _No_ , she starts to say, _I haven't ever been that to you._ But he's been though so much, she lets him have it.

“Ja,” She closes her eyes, squeezing him closer. “Mein süsses kind.”

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just a short companion chapter because I got into watching "The Road" today...gave me a bunch of feels.

He's still inside the electrified room, with no idea whether that's the extent of where he's being held or when they're going to start hurting him, shocking him with the wires attached to his body. He's only been poked and prodded as of yet. Stryker's back with him now, tracing the markings on his skin lightly with a sharp surgical blade.

“You know, it's very uncharacteristic of her. Darkholme, I mean.”

Kurt hisses, “What is?” through clenched fangs. Trying to suck all his breath in so he's lower and the knife won't make contact.

“Well, I can't see why she would let such a hideous liability as you into the world. To allow you to exist – that's not like her at all. Don't worry, I don't expect you to be able to explain it. Fortunately that's not what I need from you.”

He wants to jerk against the straps holding him down, but he can't, not unless he wants to get cut. The blade has run up to his neck, and Stryker puts a hand on his forehead, pulling his head back. He flinches as it taps his face and wakes up, snug against Raven. The fire has almost burned down to the stone circle they contained it with at the bottom.

“Are you okay?” She's still awake, stroking a hand through his hair.

He sniffs, and hugs her in answer.

“It's a lot to take in, Kurt, I know.”

“No, it's not that...”

She shifts back a little to look him in the eye. Hers glow in the dark, so he supposes his do too, and she can see something of his inner anxiety.

“What are you afraid of?”

_Everyone who isn't you, or my friends at school or the Professor or Doctor McCoy or Agent MacTaggert. A lot of people. Especially him._

“You don't have to be scared of Stryker.” She says, like she read his mind again. She's done that before, and he didn't know how, except now he figures it's because she is who she is to him.

“Warum, why not?”

“Because I'm going to kill him.” She replies. “I'll kill anyone who touches you. Because that's my job.”

“What if someone else gets there first?”

She snorts. “Like you?”

“No...” He has gotten pretty good at toppling a Sentinel with his tail wrapped around its neck and perhaps he could manage to lift and strangle a human being like that, but he hasn't got any illusions about his own strength or his desire to do it yet. “I didn't mean me.”

“Good. It's no harm you wanting to, though, you know that. Just don't let it burn you up. That way you become...” She stops. “But I'm sure you won't. Now go back to sleep.”

He rolls into her again. “Can I just tell you one more thing?”

“Yes.”

“I thought about you all the time, in there. Even before I knew.”

“I was thinking of you too." She sighs. "I pretty much always do.”

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "I'll kill anyone who touches you..." is a quote from The Road.


End file.
